Lover's Guide

Instructions For Lover's...

Show your love by listening

Don’t wait until Friday night to be loving – be loving all the time!

Accept each other as you are.

Be your partners best friend.

Respect each other and show it by treating each other with respect.

Help without being asked.

Appreciate what you have.

Make time to be alone with each other.

Cuddle early in the evening, before you’re too tired.

If what you’re doing isn’t working , try something else.

Look for win/win solutions.

You can always make more money, but you can never make more time.
Take time now for your family.

When you need help, speak up!

Its not enough just to say ‘ I love you.’ Live your love by being considerate and kind.

Leave your job and its problems at the office.

Love has good manners.

At parties, pay more attention to your partner than to anyone else.

If you are having problems, figure out first the role you are playing.

Always make your partner feel special.

Give more love and you’ll get more love.

If you’re not sure whether to say something or not, then better don’t say.

Kindness is love in action

Share you feelings.

Call during the day, just to say ‘I love you.’

50/50 isn’t enough. You each have to give 100% if you want to have a great relationship.

Turn the TV off and take time to talk together.

You’re part of a couple, but be your own person as well.

Picture yourself as older, looking back on your life together. What do you wish you had done? Do it now...

If you’re not happy negotiate for change.

Say positive affirmations about each other and your relationship.

Make having fun together a priority.

Keep courting each other after marriage

Never go to bed mad.

Your sweetheart needs touching and affection in and out of the bedroom.

Always take each other’s feelings into consideration.

Kiss each other every night before turning out the lights.

Plan together for the future, and then work to make your plans come true.

Treat your partner at least as well as you treat your friends.

Keep up with individual hopes and dreams.

Brag about each other.

If your mate’s always busy, make appointments to see each other.

When your partner tells you a problem, don’t rush in with a solution.
Often they just want to be heard.

Pay attention to how often you interrupt and do it less.

Turn up the stereo and practise slow dancing.

Be loving, even when you don’t feel particularly loving.
When discussions get too heated, call for a recess.

Bring home flowers to your sweetheart.

View the problems life gives you as challenges to be faced together.

It’s okay to change your mind.

When you’re conversing, give your undivided attention.

It takes 72 muscles to frown and only 23 to smile – and smiling has more pleasurable results!

Your time & attention are most important gift you can give

Expect changes in your relationship and work to make them positive.

Visualize a bright future for the two of you.

Give gifts which reflect your special knowledge of your partner.

Assure your partner often that you care.

Let your mate know you care by how you act.

Look for what’s good in your partner and praise it.

Support each other’s growth.

When your partner comes home, drop what you’re and give a big welcome at the door.

Your partner will only satisfy some of your needs. Look to others for the rest.

Make Valentine’s Day Valentine’s Week!

If you want your mate to understand you, talk about yourself more.

Hinting hardly ever works. The best way to get what you want is to ask for it.

Honesty is important, but be tactful.

Assure your partner you’ll always be there.

Spend more time with other couples with whom you can laugh and joke.

Try roller skating together!

Get your partner talking by asking about a hobby or sport that’s of intrest.

One evening, hire a student who plays the violin to perform, while the two of you enjoy a candlelight dinner!

Cuddle in a movie.

Show you’re on your partner’s side.

Get up early and watch the sunrise.

When criticism is true, agree with it. (‘you are right. I am late.’)

Share your fantasies!

Be honest with each other.

Give up trying to control the other person. The only person you can really ever control is you.

During tough times, think of why you fell in love in the first place. Dwell on those things.

'I Love You’ are the words your partner most wants to hear

You can disagree without being disagreeable.

Treat each other in an ‘I’ m ok – you are OK manner.

When you feel angry, cool down before you speak up.

Express appreciation for favours.

Touch more. Touching often expresses sentiments that words alone can’t convey.

Volunteer together to help a favourite charity.

Base your relationship on your commitments to each other, not on your feelings of love. That way, as your feelings for each other rise and fall - as they surely will your – relationship will still be secure.

Instead of arguing, do problem solving.

Cuddle while you watch TV.

Surprise your mate with a spontaneous kiss.

Take dance lessons together.

Every once in a while, baby each other!

Just because you’re angry doesn’t mean you’re right.

When something goes wrong, instead of assessing blame, focus on how to do better next time.

Set aside time to be loving

Play romantic games.

Treat each other the way you wan tto be treated.

It’s easier in the long run to face your responsibilities.

Do what makes your partner feel loved. If you don’t know what that is, ask.

Tell your partner when you need extra attention.

Give a back rub without being asked.

Cherish each other.

Cut out articles that are lickely to interest your partner.

By tickets, but don’t say for what. The waiting and the surprise will be almost as much fun as the event.

Be an encourager!

Make decisions when you’re calm, never when you’re angry.

Let your mate know it’s safe to tell you everything.

Read you Just don’t understand: women and Men in conversation to learn better ways to communicate.

Give your mate ‘Love coupons@ good for flowers, kisses, massages, etc.

View your mate as a companion to enjoy life with – not a possession to ignore.

When you feel short-changed, examine whether you have unrealistic expectations.

Be on the lookout for ways to make life more fun.

Write a poem, It doesn’t have to be good – it just has to have your feelings in it.

Focus on what’s right not who’s right

Try out new restaurants.

Rather than give good advice, set a good example.

Put a dimmer on your bedroom light switch.

Some people express love by working hard. Let them know you understand that.

Cook your sweetheart’s favourite meal.

Share what life was like when you were children.

Watch ‘30s romances together. Anything by Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers will do fine.

Be grateful for your partner’s love. (Remember when you didn’t have it?)

Take vacations often, even if just one night at a bed and breakfast.

List all the ways your partner enriches your life. Share you list.

Don’t make sex the last item of your ‘todo’ list.

To see each other’s point of view, role-play being the other person.

Be tolerant. You’re both fallible human beings.

Find somethings to like about each other’s friends.

Nurture the child in you partner

Exercise together.

Help your partyner fulfil personal goals.

View money as belonging to you both, no matter who made it.

Earn more than you spend.

Respect the fact that your love’s needs and wants may differ from yours.

Honour each other’s differences rather than trying to change the,.

Rent a rowing boat and enjoy a romantic hour on the lake.

Save for tomorrow, but don’t go completely without today.

Be action-oriented, Instead of waiting for things to happen, work to make them happen!

Read the wonderful ‘Love’ chapter in ‘The Road Less Travelled ‘ for a realistic assessment of love and what it requires of us.

Go through objects each of your has saved from the past. Talk about why they’re special to you.